“better” - the backstory

photo taken in cesky krumlov, oct 2016

13th November, 2017

i started writing this song back in 2013. i was sitting the car on a random street, not yet ready to head home. still clinging to my pencil and paper days, the first verse and chorus spilled out words i didn’t know i felt.  

strangely, these first parts were written when said person was still prevalent in my life. since i couldn’t seem to finish the next verse, i ended up forgetting about it and left it tucked away in the scrappy sheets i found in my bag. i found it again many months later and saw how foretelling it was. eerie. 

space really tells you a lot. you really don’t know how much you can’t hear your own voice until the voices of others begin to disappear. and that’s when you see how happy you are now, in seeing how unhappy you were then. 

the song didn’t have a bridge until i rediscovered this song yet again a few months ago. the final lines “was this ever enough..” made question my old (and current) self and how i really felt. and helped me to finally feel finished with this piece. it only took me 5 years to get there *sheepish grin*. this song now has definitely turned from one i felt almost nonchalant about to one that is important to me. *nods head*

love, maia.